{"id":5431,"date":"2010-05-05T03:00:34","date_gmt":"2010-05-05T08:00:34","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/?p=5431"},"modified":"2010-05-05T03:00:34","modified_gmt":"2010-05-05T08:00:34","slug":"patriot-games","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/archives\/5431","title":{"rendered":"Patriot Games"},"content":{"rendered":"

The Onion: Bill Belichick Drops Off Recent Draft Picks In Middle Of Nowhere, Tells Them To Find Way Back<\/a><\/p>\n

[T]he infamously Machiavellian coach told his draft picks that there was no potable surface water for “hundreds of miles”; that it would be in their best interests not to attempt to contact any locals who crossed their path; that only the fruit at the very center of the thornbushes would be edible; that most of the indigenous wildlife, especially the arachnids, was very, very poisonous; and that one of the things he had just told them was a lie.<\/p>\n

“Show me what you got, boys,” Belichick said to the group from the backseat of a spotless black Range Rover. “If you want to be on this team, I’ll see you in four days. And if you’ve been paying attention at all, you’ll know exactly what to do. Oh, you can take your blindfolds off now. “<\/p><\/blockquote>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The Onion: Bill Belichick Drops Off Recent Draft Picks In Middle Of Nowhere, Tells Them To Find Way Back [T]he infamously Machiavellian coach told his draft picks that there was no potable surface water for “hundreds of miles”; that it … Continue reading →<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[44,52],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-5431","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-satire","category-sports"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5431","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=5431"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/5431\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=5431"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=5431"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"http:\/\/blogs.scienceforums.net\/swansont\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=5431"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}