The Case Against Pennies

aka the disgusting bacteria-ridden disks of suck that fail to facilitate commerce

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You only have to get rid of the penny for cash transactions — you could still track it for electronic ones. You’d just round up or down on the whole transaction.

UPDATE: Those statistics are out of date. In 2009, it cost 1.6 cents to make a penny and 6.1 cents to make a nickel; the US Mint lost 22 million on penny and nickel production, not the 70 million they lost in 2008. (This is because the recession has made zinc and nickel cheaper.)

5 thoughts on “The Case Against Pennies

  1. End all coinage. Integral dollar amounts only. All transactions are to be conducted electronically – paper money is demonitized. End of wasteful Treasury employment and infrastrucure. The War on Drugs is won at a stroke. The vast yawning financial ulcer of US imprisonment is also ended – simply remove “prisoners” from the monetary system. 100% IRS compliance as every dollar is auto-traced.

    Everybody will be implanted with a biometric ID chip in the manner of On-Star. 100% monitoring of 100% of the population 100% of the time. Heaven on Earth!

    Uncle Al says, “The formality of ballots yields to the necessity of bullets.”

  2. You couldn’t get rid of the nickel without also getting rid of the dime. You need some coin that represents the smallest resolution of the currency, so if we have both dimes and quarters, there need to be nickels.

  3. you can have my penny when you pry it from my cold dead hands!!11!!!!1

    oh, and MAKE PLUTO A PLANET AGAIN!1!!1!!!11

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