I’m pretty sure it’s pronounced “Wesley-Ann”.

Victor: You NEED to remember to put the GPS in your car.

Me: No. I’m not using it anymore.

Victor: Why not?!

Me: It’s trying to kill me.

Victor: *

Me: Remember last week when I had to go into town and I got the driving instructions from mapquest and you made me take the GPS as a back-up but then halfway there the GPS is all “Turn left now” and I’m all “No. Mapquest says to go straight” and it’s like “TURN LEFT NOW” and I’m all “No way, bitch” and then she’s all sighing at me like she’s frustrated and she keeps saying “Recalculating” in this really judgey, condescending way and then she’s all “TURN LEFT NOW!” and then I’m all freaked out so I turn left exactly like she says and then she’s all “Recalculating. Recalculating.” and I’m like “I DID EXACTLY WHAT YOU SAID TO DO. WHAT’S WITH THE TONE, WHORE?”

I got my mom a GPS unit for her car last Christmas, and she makes similar comments about the tone and meaning of “recalculating.” She doesn’t think it’s trying to kill her, though there’s a funky map anomaly we noticed, where the directions were to turn left and then immediately turn right and left again, when you were just supposed to go straight. (It’s at the light just before you go North over the bridge into Rexford, NY on Rt 146). Hadn’t really considered that it might just be a conspiracy.

Oh, and there’s this, too.