If you work in a big enough place, or even a small one for long enough, you’ll eventually run into the problem of two or more workers with the same first name. What do you do to bring the Pauli exclusion principle into play — a way to distinguish them so they don’t occupy the same state? Assuming, of course, you aren’t Australian philosophers, in which case “Bruce” works for everyone.

I’ve seen a case within a fairly small group that had four guys with the same first name. That was solved because, like many names, you can use versions of them, e.g. John vs Johnny, one of the guys was often called by his last name, and for the last one we used his initials (though I’m told people in the same/adjacent offices just called him “Mike”). And obviously nicknames are an option. In one dorm, back when I was in school, there was Big G and Little G. The Kids in the Hall had Cathy with a C and Kathy with a K. I once heard a colleague refer to the newest addition as “New Carla,” but is one brave enough to call the other one “Old Carla?” (What if Carla isn’t old? What if she is?). Ownership is another option — same name but different divisions has led to conversations such as, “Brent said he needed it. No, not our Brent, their Brent.”

Any other inventive ways of delineating office identities?