Daily Archives: February 3, 2010

The Word Salad is a Perq

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Oh, I found you a new job

Unfortunately, nobody can possibly be qualified to do it. Ultimatonic field patterning instruments, WTF?

Ultimatons, for the uninitiated (which included me up to five minutes before writing this:

Ultimatons are the energy particles which make up the electrons, the PRIME physical units of material existence (472:1); Ultimatons aggregate into electrons. (475:1)

Ultimatons do not whirl about in circuits within electrons, but they CLUSTER, – or spread, in accordance with their AXIAL REVOLUTIONARY VELOCITIES, which determines:

a. The differential electronic dimensions
b. The NEGATIVE or POSITIVE reactions of the several types of electronic units
The entire SEGREGATION AND GROUPING of electronic matter, RESULT from these various functions of the COMPONENT ULTIMATONIC INTERASSOCIATION

Ah, all becomes clear. The woo runs deep in this one, Obi-Wan.

One Fish, Two Fish

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From Fish to Infinity

I have a friend who gets a tremendous kick out of science, even though he’s an artist. Whenever we get together all he wants to do is chat about the latest thing in evolution or quantum mechanics. But when it comes to math, he feels at sea, and it saddens him. The strange symbols keep him out. He says he doesn’t even know how to pronounce them.

In fact, his alienation runs a lot deeper. He’s not sure what mathematicians do all day, or what they mean when they say a proof is elegant. Sometimes we joke that I just should sit him down and teach him everything, starting with 1 + 1 = 2 and going as far as we can.

Crazy as it sounds, over the next several weeks I’m going to try to do something close to that. I’ll be writing about the elements of mathematics, from pre-school to grad school, for anyone out there who’d like to have a second chance at the subject — but this time from an adult perspective. It’s not intended to be remedial. The goal is to give you a better feeling for what math is all about and why it’s so enthralling to those who get it.